MEU ANIVERSÁRIO! (FRUSTRAÇÃO).

Essa data foi um problema em minha vida! Tentei arrancar de dentro do peito durante muitos tempo! Na verdade, desde quando completei oito anos! Naquele aniversário me sentia muito ansiosa e carente. Queria muito apagar “velinhas”! Essa vontade era silenciosa, nunca expressei! Sabia que não ia ser ouvida! O desejo amordaçado estava lá, quieto e forte! Na verdade era um sonho ! Uma criança não entende certas coisas, só pode sentir!  Naquele aniversário, não sabia porque, acordei numa expectativa imensa! Esperava uma surpresa! Por coincidência aconteceu de uma tia “rica”, chegar de-repente, dizendo que queria me fazer um bolo bem bonito! Fiquei super feliz! Ela  me deu como presente, uma pequena quantia em dinheiro! Quando resolveu começar a fazer o bolo pediu pra eu ir comprar os ingredientes na vendinha da esquina. Como eu sabia que minha mãe não tinha dinheiro algum, fui quieta e usei o meu! Gastei quase tudo mas, valia a pena. Finalmente ia ganhar o ” sonhado bolo”! Estava feliz! Fui brincar no quintal enquanto ela preparava tudo. Depois de algum tempo que eu brincava com os meus amiguinhos imaginários, ouvi ela me chamar! Laura, ficou pronto, vem olhar seu bolo!! Ansiosa fui correndo! Quando cheguei lá,  não acreditava no que via! Fiquei muito frustrada! Aquele não era o bolo que eu tinha sonhado! Eu queria um bem grande! Cheio de creme com muito coco! Muitos enfeites! Na minha cabeça tudo era tão simples! Não precisava de mais nada! Minha tia não tinha entendido nada! Sabe o que ela colocou, pra enfeitar? Uma velha rosa vermelha de plástico que tirou do vaso de minha mãe!. Aquilo me marcou demais! Fiquei tão triste!A sensação que tive  é que estavam gozando de mim! Hoje vejo  que me senti humilhada. Os anos se passaram! Me casei, tenho dois filhos  e marido. Eles conseguiram mudar  isso em mim! Resisti muito! Era mais forte que eu! No meu último aniversário me fizeram uma surpresa. Algo que eu não esperava mesmo! Buscaram uma antiga mestra e amiga, que eu não via há anos e me fizeram uma surpresa! Uma nova experiência em minha data! Queriam me fazer feliz! Acho que alguma mudança aconteceu. Consegui sentir algo novo! Parece que meu coração aqueceu e derreteu a rosa de plástico! Já tenho planos para comemorar o próximo! Acho que vai ser um “FESTÃO”!

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