Mariza era uma mãe exageradamente perfeccionista! Se exigia demais, sofria muito no papel de mãe! É como se ela tivesse um juiz interno, vinte e quatro horas por dia, julgando todos os seus pensamentos e atitudes! Projetava em seu único filho, todos os anseios de sua vida! Vivia uma relação muito confusa. Ela o tratava como se ele fosse um bebê e não uma criança de cinco anos, idade que ele tinha!”( Bruno era uma criança linda, tinha um par de olhos incrivelmente expressivos e escuros, fazendo contraste com uma pele clara e rosada)”! Sua mãe não tinha desenvolvido em si, formas de administrar situações de separação entre ela e Bruno. Era como se ela fosse ele e ele fosse ela! Mantinha a simbiose natural dos primeiros meses de vida, entre mãe e filho! Bruno naturalmente, por ser uma criança, correspondia plenamente à esse padrão de atitude da mãe! Isso, com o passar do tempo, foi se intensificando a ponto dele não ficar sozinho nem na sala de sua própria casa! Esse drama estava tomando proporções enormes! Mariza começou a ter crises de stress, que é muito comum nessas circunstâncias. Não se dava conta dos motivos! Como estava passando da hora de Bruno entrar na escolinha, pressionada pela família, Mariza não teve escolha! Nova fase, novo drama! Na escola, como era natural, todas as mães que precisassem podiam ficar no início das aulas com a criança, durante o período de adaptação. Com Mariza e Bruno esse tempo foi ultrapassando todos os limites! Ele tinha que ir espiar a mãe, de tempo em tempo, senão entrava em desespero! Po esse motivo ela permanecia lá, o período integral, firme e forte! Não adiantava orientações dos coordenadores e psicopedagogos. Esse drama todo, estava tomando dimensões enormes. A escola resolveu interferir, de uma forma firme! Ela teria que buscar ajuda psicológica! Tentar resolver essa situação de tanto sofrimento desnecessário! Assim Mariza chegou em meu consultório, fragilizada, insegura e cheia de culpas. Conversando com ela, pude perceber sua enorme carência e insegurança e a dificuldade que tinha em cuidar de si mesma. A “simbiose”, que ainda existia era entre sua criança interna e seu próprio filho. Os dois precisavam de cuidados! Mariza precisou se ouvir e se sentir como pessoa. Trabalhar sua identidade e seus papéis, como mulher e mãe! A tomada de consciência foi chegando, ela conseguiu sair pausadamente deste abismo emocional em que se encontrava. Bruno foi ficando seguro, interagindo socialmente, enquanto sua mãe foi se descobrindo em atitudes novas e saudáveis como mulher!
Na difícil “arte” de ser mãe, podemos nos perder vez ou outra. Mas o amor libertador é maravilhoso! É isso, o caminho é encontrá-lo! Cibele
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