EU REINVENTEI UM AMOR! (IDEALIZAÇÃO)

A porta bateu! Bateu tão forte, tão de-repente! Naquele domingo chuvoso, depois de um lauto café da manhã, depois de momentos deliciosos, começou do nada uma discussão sem fim… Me dei conta que estava aos berros, tentando me defender da enorme agressividade do homem  que sempre chamei de ” MEU AMOR”! Quando conheci André, há uns sete anos atrás, tudo era encantamento. Seus olhos azuis, sorridentes, continham um mistério dos céus! Nossa atração foi mútua e muito forte. Adorava seu cheiro, a sua barba me roçando o pescoço, meu corpo todo. Era um arrepio só! A gente tinha altos momentos de um incrível tesão. As nossas peles se conversavam! Infelizmente, a rotina da vida envolve questões muito práticas e, algumas vezes cansativas demais. Mudanças na nossa relação foram acontecendo gradativamente, só percebi quando foi se evidenciando em André, um humor ácido, crítico e egoísta. Se revelou uma pessoa de uma intolerância absurda em que eu não o reconhecia mais. Dentro do meu peito foram acontecendo abruptas alterações. Já não suportava mais que ele se aproximasse de mim. Só conseguia sentir fragmentos daquele amor! O meu coração igual uma pedra, parecia que nem pulsava mais. Fui ficando assustada e infeliz! O meu marido se tornou um irmão chato e mesquinho. A separação foi inevitável! Foi um momento muito difícil, avassalador! Com uma sensação profunda de solidão, depois de estar solteira há dois meses, assim como uma louca, resolvi inventar um amor. Era noite do “dia dos namorados”! Estava tomando um café quente e bem forte, sentada na varanda da minha nova casa, me sentindo abandonada na vida. Surgiu a ideia reconfortante  de inventar um amor! Entrei nesse devaneio e fui dando formas ao meu novo projeto. Construí antes de tudo o caráter. Depois fui montando em minha mente, o perfil físico e por último coloquei a expressão que sonhava que esse novo amor devia ter. Fiquei assim por quase duas horas. Já quase terminando o meu café, nesta altura gelado, busquei visualizar a imagem produzida pelo meu desejo. UAU!!! Me deu aquele arrepio antigo, tão conhecido. Pulei da cadeira! ERA O ANDRÉ! Com um olhar um tanto triste, choroso, mas ainda com seus mistérios. Meu coração se derreteu e chorou! Como assim? Fiquei meditando muito sobre isso. Toda essa experiência fez com que eu repensasse a minha vida e as formas que uso para administrar situações emocionais. Me vi um tanto rígida e controladora, incapaz de lidar com o diferente. Resolvi dar uma chance ao destino. Acho que vou procurar meu antigo amor! Talvez ele também tenha me reinventado! Ser feliz envolve mudanças e riscos! QUEM SABE?

171 comentários em “EU REINVENTEI UM AMOR! (IDEALIZAÇÃO)”

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