Camila ganhou dos Deuses o privilégio das grandes belezas. Sempre ouviu isso das pessoas! Dona de traços perfeitos e de uma alma imensamente sensível. Meio introvertida. Difícil de se abrir emocionalmente, mas com uma enorme facilidade de perceber o outro. Filha do meio entre duas irmãs de temperamentos fortes e muito controladores. Teve enormes dificuldades de conquistar um espaço e se sentir respeitada. Tornou-se insegura e carente emocionalmente. Esse seu jeito excessivamente meigo sempre foi interpretado como fragilidade pela maioria das pessoas. Na verdade, encobria toda uma força e vontade de vencer. Camila não conseguiu ter atitude para explorar essa capacidade. Esses aspectos ficaram bloqueados causando-lhe muitas angústias e conflitos. Pelo fato de ter sido o “sanduíche” entre as irmãs e de ter se submetido a muitas situações de rejeições e críticas negativas, desenvolveu internamente uma enorme carência e instabilidade emocional. Medo de expressar vontades, desejos e opiniões. Verdadeiro pavor de não ser aceita! Assim ancorou-se numa fragilidade crescente que foi dificultando toda a sua vida. Muitas vezes, essa instabilidade oscilava entre a segurança de sua beleza física e a insegurança emocional. Sabia que era fisicamente bonita! O espelho confirmava. Mas isso não bastava! Ela queria ser admirada e desejada! Não conseguiu conquistar um espaço saudável no ambiente familiar e nem no social. Sentia-se o patinho feio tendo que se contentar com “restos e sobras”! Algumas vezes, quando sentia que ia se deprimir, corria para o espelho. Ali, ela tentava resgatar um pouco de segurança e auto estima e, assim, recomeçava a buscar o caminho de seus desejos. Quantas tentativas perdidas, meu Deus! Quantas noites mal dormidas com sonhos recorrentes! Em seus pesadelos sempre havia histórias de mortes e grandes perdas. Muita ansiedade. Muito medo! “BELA E ANSIOSA”. Algumas vezes, a sua angústia era tão grande que perdia a vontade de viver. Entrava numa grande depressão. Seus pais também tiveram uma parcela de culpa na auto-construção fragilizada de Camila. Claro que foi de forma inconsciente. Eles também, de algum jeito, não receberam de suas fontes de afetos o necessário para administrar a extrema sensibilidade de Camila. Essa menina cresceu, mas não conseguiu amadurecer. Emocionalmente fixou-se na adolescência. Está com trinta e seis anos e meio e se comporta como se tivesse quinze. Continua linda! Está num momento de intensos questionamentos de vida. Fase de grandes conflitos e sonhos. Estão surgindo sinais de que quer se apropriar de sua idade emocional e a integrar à cronológica. Quer virar mulher! Pesadelos estão emergindo, mobilizando ansiedades e angústias. Começou a fazer terapia. Sim, ela decidiu que quer mudar! Trouxe um sonho recorrente para ser entendido. O SONHO:- Estava em um hotel com as suas duas irmãs. Elas tinham combinado de irem à uma festa. As irmãs já tinham se arrumado, lindamente. Maquiadas e vestidas sensualmente, expressando segurança e se sentindo “rainhas”! Camila, atrasada como sempre, não tinha se organizado em nada, embora estivesse louca para ir à festa. As irmãs, impacientes, gritavam pra que ela se apressasse. Ameaçavam ir embora. Camila, afobada, correu até o banheiro para tomar uma ducha rápida. Ofegante, não conseguia se desvencilhar das roupas. Muita dificuldade pra tirar cada peça. Eram muitas as camadas de roupas em seu corpo. Parecia não acabar nunca! Ela foi entrando em desespero. Não podia perder aquela festa de jeito nenhum! Finalmente, quando conseguiu entrar no chuveiro, seu pé esquerdo entalou no ralo. Que desespero! Havia muita sujeira naquele ralo. Mesmo com muito nojo, ela conseguiu terminar o seu banho. Voltou para o quarto e foi correndo vestir a roupa da festa. Novamente a ansiedade bateu forte! A cama estava muito bagunçada. Muitas roupas misturadas. Ela não conseguia encontrar o vestido escolhido. Desespero!!! Falta de ar. Taquicardia!!! Acordou. Ainda meio trêmula se recostou na beira da cama e buscou se aquecer num tantinho de sol que entrava pela janela de quarto. Sob o calor acolhedor daquele sol de outono, ficou refletindo sobre a sua vida por quase duas horas. Decidiu que queria mudar. Se entender melhor. Sair da armadilha emocional em que se encontrava. Apresentei Camila! Sou sua terapeuta. Estamos analisando toda a simbologia desse seu sonho. Ela já reconhece as diversas camadas de defesa que precisou desenvolver para se proteger dos sofrimentos. Estamos respirando. Alongando. Sentindo e expressando suas dores. Camada por camada. Respeitando o ritmo da vida expressiva. RESGATE DE AMORES E DORES RECALCADOS PELO TEMPO!!!
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