O HOMEM CROCODILO! ( ENCOURAÇAMENTO)

Todos achavam Antônio um homem muito legal! Sociável, extrovertido, brincalhão e muito educado. Sabia se colocar nas situações. Tentava sempre ser o centro das atenções, com um certo carisma, que sabia utilizar! Centralizador. Buscava sempre  ser admirado para se sentir num lugar  de destaque  Ele nem questionava seus próprios limites. Era viciado em trabalho! O importante era  mostrar habilidade. Isso  alimentava muito seu ego.  Homem loiro, alto,  tinha quarenta anos, cabelos enrolados, dando a impressão de ser um “grande bebê”! Era chefe do setor de engenharia de uma grande empresa de construção. Adorava comandar e ter subalternos; isso era essencial para a sua vaidade! Gostava de usar roupas de grife e comer em restaurantes caros. Não tinha compaixão por pessoas que ele julgava ser de classe  inferior. Era impiedoso com os desfavorecidos! Jamais teve atitude de dar esmola à algum indigente. É com esse desconhecido, “casca dura”, que um dia ingenuamente construí sonhos. No pesadelo que vivi com esse rapaz, nem DEUS ACREDITA! Conheci Antonio numa tarde muito fria e ensolarada de outono. Fui tomar um chocolate quente numa padaria muito frequentada, perto de minha casa. Lá tinha um pão especial integral que, quentinho, derretia na boca!  Sentei numa mesinha de canto, encostada na parede.  Assim que dei a primeira mordida em meu saboroso pão, percebi que alguém me olhava insistentemente. Tentei ignorar mas, em pouquíssimo tempo, aquele par de olhos castanhos, inquisidores, já se encontrava em minha mesa. Chegou comentando do frio exagerado daquela tarde e da vontade de tomar o meu chocolate quente! Apesar de ser “cara de pau”, tinha um bom papo! Confesso que gostei do jeito atrevido dele. Gosto de homem com atitude! Ele nem era o meu tipo físico. Mas ali começou uma paixão! Começamos a conversar e nem vimos o tempo passar. Passamos quase quatro horas naquela padaria. Quando olhei no relógio, me assustei. Tinha perdido o cinema com minha amiga, Milena. “Paciência, acho que ela entenderia”. Estava me sentindo leve e feliz! “ANTÔNIO”, talvez pudesse ser o meu grande amor! Ficamos assim, num namoro com muito tesão,  por um bom tempo. Não conhecia ainda o outro lado da personalidade dele.  Assim que fomos tendo mais intimidade, algumas vezes, suas reações me assustavam. Eu sempre procurava dar um desconto! Podia ser stress! Assim, o tempo foi passando e eu caindo numa realidade ambivalente. Queria continuar com a nossa relação, mas temia e rejeitava esse lado duro de seu caráter. Antônio foi se mostrando insensível e cruel em diversas situações. Nesse meio tempo engravidei. O que deveria ser um sonho, virou pesadelo. “E agora”?  Não teve jeito. Tive que contar! Afinal, apesar de não querer, ele era o pai! Sua reação foi monstruosa. Me assustei. Fiquei revoltada. Ele simplesmente jogou o dinheiro no chão e disse pra eu resolver o problema. Não haveria negociação! Chorei todas as lágrimas que tinha! Gritei! Blasfemei e o expulsei de minha vida. Foi a gota d’ água! “O nosso filho”? Está a cara dele. Acabou de fazer seis anos. “Antônio?”. Acho que a vida lhe deu o troco. Sofreu um acidente. Ficou sem movimentos nas pernas! Trabalha em casa. Vive sozinho e sem amigos. As visitas que Daniel, nosso filho, faz a ele são sua única alegria. Parece que a pele  de crocodilo está se trocando! Aquele olhos inquisidores do passado já estão conseguindo chorar!

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